Friday, March 07, 2008

Stuff White People Like

This is the best blog ever. But you really need to read the commentary. As best I can tell, the list is also highly accurate. I appear to like about 90% of the stuff white people like.

Here is an excerpt from the #67 thing white people like: Standing Still at Concerts:

Music is very important to white people. It truly is the soundtrack to their lives, meaning that white people are constantly thinking about what songs would be on the soundtrack for the biopic. The problem is that most of the music that white people like isn’t really dance-friendly. More often the songs are about pain, or love, or breaking up with someone, or not being able to date someone, or death.

So when white people go to concerts at smaller venues, what to do they do? They stand still! This is an important part of white concert going as it enables you to focus on the music, and it will prevent drawing excess attention to you. Remember, at a concert everyone is watching you just waiting for you to try to start dancing. Then they will make fun of you.

The result is Belle and Sebastian concerts that essentially looks more like a disorganized line of people than a music event.

If you find yourself invited to a concert with a white person, do NOT expect to dance. Prepare yourself for three hours of standing reasonably still. It is also advised to get a beer or (if legal) a cigarette so you have something to do with your hands. Although it is acceptable to occasionally raise one hand and point just above the stage.

This is all true.


nikkip said...

i have never seen a better list of spot-on generalizations in my life. it made me cry from laughing so myself and many people i know.

Anonymous said...

Garfield, minus Garfield is a pretty good blog, too.

Karen said...

i love that blog. it's scarily true, too!

the apple-products one is esp hilarious, specifically in the comments.