There is a job search site called The Ladders. For the low, low fee of $49.95 per month the prospective unemployed slacker is provided access to a database of more than two jobs within the region ("region" being loosely defined as "Western Hemisphere") that pay more than $100,000 per year.
Alternately, said unemployed slacker can use the more traditional route (e.g., monster.com, dice.com, careerbuilder.com) and find up to three jobs in the more narrowly defined "Midwest" region. These jobs typically pay 25% of what the formerly employed slacker used to make.
I note that The Ladders website currently features an article called "What To Tell the Kids After a Layoff." How about "Applebee's is hiring waitresses" or "College? Shit, those history classes cost money."